Thursday, June 12, 2008

Me, My Brother and My Sister

Me, my brother and my sister. The three of us. We have a bond that most people don't understand. I don't even know if we understand but, we don't have to.

We don't have the kind of relationship that we are constantly on the phone talking and sometimes we may go months without seeing each other. But, when one of us needs the others we are there. just happens.....and unexpected phone call....just when you needed it. We are easy with each other. When we are together it is like we have never been apart.

I am the oldest. I am the caretaker and the peace maker. My brother is the middle chld and the only son. He is the giver and the protector. My sister is the baby. She is the loving and confident one.

The three of us are different and yet we are the same. Our lives have taken different paths but, those paths merge back into each other. We have a is a bond that cannot be broken.

Always remember......if you mess with one of will have to deal with the other two.

My Daddy

When I was younger, I thought my Daddy hung the moon.......I found out later he had not. My Daddy was a big part of my life when I was a little girl, but as I grew older he slowly started to disappear from my life day.....he was gone.

When I was younger I thought my Daddy was know....those kind of things that when you are little, seem like the funniest things you have ever seen, but when you get older you realize they are not funny at all. Maybe it is because I grew up and my Daddy did not.

I always tried to make excuses for my Daddy. I wanted so bad for him to be the Daddy that I needed.....but then I thought maybe it is me......maybe I am expecting too much......maybe not.

The night of my high school graduation, my Daddy left before I got my diploma. He told me before hand that he might not get to stay the whole time because he was leaving to go out on a run(he was a truck driver at that time)and he had to head out before my graduation was over with. I hugged him and said "that's ok Daddy, I understand". It hurt, but I understood that he had to work and make money. After graduation, all of my family went back to our house. I walked in the door....and there.....standing in bare feet drinking a Daddy. He had not left yet.....he could have stayed for my graduation.....but.....he didn't. I plastered a smile on my face and pretended it was ok. (remember....we had company).

My life has been filled with a lot of disappointment, when it comes to my Daddy. I used to think it was me, but as I got older I realized it was not me at all.My Daddy had things going on that prevented him from being that Daddy I needed.

After many years of pain and anguish, I finally came to the realization that I was never going to have the Daddy that I wanted to have. It is ok for me to love my Daddy and I do. It is true that there have been times that I have missed out on having a Daddy but, what I have missed is nothing compared to what he has missed out on. I hate this for him.

My Daddy has three children, seven grandchildren and three great grandchildren. He has missed out on the most important moments in his childrens lives. I don't think he has seen any of his grandchildren more that two or three times each(if that) and he has NEVER seen his great grandchildren.....I don't even know if he is aware that they exist.

Sometimes, I find myself wondering how he is. Is he he he he thinking about me? (sigh) I love my Daddy and I truly do wish the best for him but, my Daddy is NOT a part of my life and that is the choice he made.

My life is wonderful and it is filled with many people who love me. Have I missed my Daddy? Of course I have. I miss the Daddy I used to have and hope and pray that one day, that Daddy will come back.

Fathers day is always a sad thing for me. It is a day of recognition for is the day....every year.....that makes me wish.....I had a my Daddy.

I pray that one day, my Daddy will come back into my life. That door is always open......all he has to do is step right on in.

Sunday, June 8, 2008

The Princess Needed A Swim Suit

Ok, it is once again summer time and the princess needed a new swim suit. Once again last years suit does not fit. Let me just go ahead and tell you that I would rather have a tooth pulled than go shopping with the princess.

Once upon a time it was a pleasure to shop for the princess. You know......back when I had TASTE.......back before the princess became a teenager.........back when she thought Mama knew everything.

We first went to Dillards. They had some very cute suits but, eveything I touched was ugly and there just really was not a thing she would have in THAT store. This is JUUUUST great......the princess is in one of her moods. We met my sister at the mall. Thank God! That took some of the pressure off of me.

We then went to a store called Body Central (one of her favorite places). I wisely kept my mouth shut and let her look and my sister suggest. After about an hour and half of trying on three whole bathing suits.....she decided on two. Both blue......just different shades of blue.....but still blue.

I remember when everything I bought or suggested, she loved, I remember when she used to talk to me, I remember when she did not know how to roll her eyes or slam doors, I remember when pink and purple were her favorite colors. (sigh) I guess I am just not real cool to her right now.......I guess it is a girl thing.

My son and his friends think I am cool.........I try to be that way with her but.......she treats me like I am a nerd.........I'm not a nerd........I don't I an nerd?..........NOOOOOO!

I guess I just need to enjoy those occasional crumbs she gives me. You know.....those times she will actually sit down and talk (as long as I don't ask the wrong question). I will just bide my time because I know that one day she will be normal again.......won't she?

Saturday, June 7, 2008

Pets are family too!

I found out this week that my cousin Wendy got some very sad news. Her dog, Moby has cancer. My heart hurts for her. This is a very special member of her family. She has had this dog in her family for years.

Anyone who has never had a pet can not understand the overwhelming love you can have for them. They ease into your heart before you know what has hit you and when you lose one, the grief you have is almost unbearable. What makes this grief harder is that, most people don't understand this kind of loss.

We lost a very beloved dog named Jasper last year. His mama belonged to us and we were there the night he was born. We picked him out from a litter of eight. The whole family fell completely and utterly under his spell. The day he died was devastating to us. We found ourselves still looking for him when we came home. He was so special and I don't know that there will be another like him.

We have three red poodles named Brandy, Whiskey & Bailey. They are special too. Brandy was the first one we got.

I told my husband he could get a new set of golf clubs if he would just let me have her. Well guess what........she is his baby!

The next one we got was Whiskey(that is what you get when you let a teenage boy name a dog)

We got him by accident. My son wanted a male red poodle and when we saw him he begged his Dad to let him have it. His Dad told him that if he could talk them down on the price he could get him.......well he did.......and we took Whiskey home. Whiskey is attached to me.

Our third red poodle is the baby of Brandy andWhiskey her name is Bailey.

When she was born she was very tiny and her eyes did not develop so, she is blind. Don't feel sorry for her though. She is like any other dog. SHE does not know she is different. She runs plays and can go anywhere she wants. Bailey is the whole families baby.

We also have four puppies from a second litter that we are trying to find homes for now. I am in love with every one of them. We had five but, one of them has found her new home.


We also have two more dogs who are outside dogs. They are country dogs big time. They chase squirrels & cows and they play in the creek all of the time. Chelsea is starting to get pretty old. She was abandoned by the road as a puppy and we brought her home to be a part of our family. She is some kind of terrier. Holly is part lab and part bulldog. She is the mommy to Jasper. She is solid black and she is a rescue dog too. They are special to us too.


We also have two quarter horses, Dixie and Gypsy. When we got them they were in bad shape. They had rain rot and were way under size. We got them in November and they have gotten so much bigger and they are beautiful. We still can't ride them yet but we love to spend time with them. There is just something so majestic about a horse.

Pets are special. They love you no matter what. They don't care if you are too fat or too skinny. They don't care if you are beautiful or ugly. They don't even care if you have any friends. All they know is that your are their people. They are thrilled to see you whether you have been gone a week or five minutes. How many people feel that way about us?

Pets are our very special family too!

Thursday, June 5, 2008

My Mother

My Mother is one of ten children. Yes, I said ten. She is third from the oldest, she is one of three girls and is the oldest daughter. My Mother married young (18) and had me by the time she was nineteen. My brother came three years after that and my sister nine years after my brother (cause I asked for her).

My Mother and her brothers and sisters grew up poor. The older kids had to pick cotton and help take care of the younger kids. In spite of all of this they all grew up to be really wonderful people.

Now that you have some of the facts I will tell you a few things about my Mother. First of all, my Mother loves to sing.........all the time. Her favorite thing to do is to call you on your birthday and sing Happy Birthday! She makes sure that you are not home so that she can leave it on your answering machine.

Mother is scared to death of snakes. I don't mean she just doesn't like snakes.....I mean she is completely, totally terrified of snakes. She is scared of rubber snakes, pictures of snakes and snakes on TV, but most of all she is scared of real live snakes. One time me and my sister were in Mother's garage and all we could smell were moth balls. We looked and looked for the moth balls. We figured they had spilled out somewhere. The smell of moth balls was so bad that our eyes were watering. We ask her "Mama? Did you know that your garage smells like moth balls? and she said "yes".........."well Mama?.......why does it smell like moth balls?" She giggled and said "Well, someone told me that moth balls will keep snakes put them all over the garage." It sounded pretty reasonable to us......through the moth ball "high" that we now had.

When my daughter was born, she was very sick and she was in the NICU in another town. I was there by myself because my hsuband was at home taking care of the younger two children. My Mother had called to check on us and I was having a very bad day. I was upset and crying. We hung up the phone. Next thing I knew my Mother was walking into the hospital. She had driven two hours to come and check on me and the baby. She stayed a little while and then drove back home. She does things like that sometimes.

When we were growing up my Mother would decide that she wanted to go somewhere. I don' t mean to the grocery store I mean on a trip. One time she decided that we would go to Disney World, which was about 7 or 8 hours away. Me, my brother, sister and my Mother all loaded up and drove all night to Disney World. We got there when it opened, spent the day and drove back home that night. We were exhausted but, it was fun!

One night, my Mother decided that she needed to go to the Post Office which was in a nearby town. It was late at night so she wanted me to go with her. I was already in bed with my blue and white striped long john p.j.'s (with feet in them) . She said "just put on a robe, we will only be gone a few minutes, and you don't even have to get out." Well, low and behold we go to leave the post office and the car dies on us in the middle of the road.....late at night.....I AM IN BLUE AND WHITE STRIPED FOOTY PJ'S!!!! All of these really nice......good looking......police officers show up to help. Well, I will just end this story now by telling you.....I WAS NOT AMUSED!!!

My Mother, at times was your typical Mother. She cooked, cleaned and even made our clothes. My Mother was also not a typical Mother. She went to the Post Office and to stores at odd hours and she took us on impomptu vacations. Our lives, needless to say have never been boring and we probably got to go places that most kids back then did not get to go to. All of this was because of my Mama!

Wednesday, June 4, 2008


Don't you just love to say okra. Come on say it.....okra.....okra.....okra. Ok, you have said now but, do you know what it is? Is okra a southern food? I wonder. Oh, well. Let me tell you about it just in case you don't know.

Okra is a vegetable. It is a long green pod. You have to cut it off the vine. There are many ways to cook okra. You can cut it up and fry it, or you can boil it, stew it and even cook it with tomatoes.

When you fry it you cut it up and bread it with a corn meal mixture. You put it in the black iron skillet full of hot grease. Cook it until the breading in lightly browned.

To stew okra you cut it up, put it in the frying pan with just a little oil and cook it down until it becomes mushy. (yes, I do know that mushy is not really a cooking term but, that is the best description I could come up with) Oh yes, add salt to taste.

When you boil okra you just put the whole pod in boiling salted water until they become really slimy and tender. Boiled okra will just slide right down your throat. YUM!!!!

Maybe okra is an aquired taste but most everyone I know will eat it in some form or other. I like it any way it is cooked.

AHHHHH okra.......don't you just love to say it? Okra,okra, okra,!

My Pictures

Photography is my passion. I love taking pictures. It is like a therapy for me. When I take pictures I can't wait to get home to see what I have. I love to study them and tear them apart to see what I could have done better. There is nothing more satisfying than getting the right shot.

I am not a fan of posed pictures. If I have to do posed pictures I try to come up with something different and totally unexpected.

There is nothing worse to me than neat little people all in a row. Shake it up and show me who you are.

I love candid pictures. When you get a picture of someone that is uanaware that you are there, you are able to see their soul. You can see the person they truly are, not the person they want you to see.

There is nothing more beautiful than a picture of someone lost in may not know WHAT they are thinking but, you know HOW they feel about it.


Sports pictures are my favorite pictures to take. I love freezing that blur of action. You can see things that you don't see on a video or with the naked eye. Getting a close up candid picture of an athlete who is "in the zone" is awesome. Athletes show more emotion in the heat of a game than anyone I know. Their emotions range from frustration to elation, from pain to joy, and from victory to defeat. Every emotion that a human is capable of showing can be witnessed on a football field, a baseball diamond or a basketball court. It is all just have to look.


My favorite subjects are my children and my husband, "T". If they ever doubt the love I have for them, all they have to do is look at the pictures I have made over the years. Those pictures are made with more love than they will ever be able to comprehend.


Any way, my pictures are my art. They are my therapy. They are my excitement. They are the soul of my family. They are my fun. But, most of all my pictures are a piece of me.....they are my heart....they are my soul....they are my self portrait.....without me in it!

So if you ever look at any of my pictures.....look really close.....because you will see me.......I am the one behind the camera and YOU are looking at my life through My eyes!

Monday, June 2, 2008

My Sister Exist Because of Me!

Now I know you are thinking this is one strange woman here but, it is the truth! My sister is here because I wanted her to be.

When I was about ten or eleven, I decided that I just had to have a baby sister. NOT a baby brother.....I already had one of those. It had to be a baby sister. I started praying every night..."God bless Mama, Daddy,Chris, Granny & Grandaddy Tew, Granny & Grandaddy Hartley, all of our dogs and cats (and everyone else who happened to be in my life at that time) and think you might could give me a baby sister?" Every night I prayed for my baby sister. I promised I would take care of her, change her diapers and dress her up and all that stuff.

I told my Mama I was praying for a baby she would be ready and all. Well do you know she just laughed at me and told me "that is not going to happen." Well guess what? HA HA HA......I got my baby sister! know what else? I changed her diapers, I dressed her up, and I took her every where I went. I even took her to my school dances. Now remember.....when I was seventeen she was only five years old but, it did not matter. She was the baby sister I prayed for.

You know what else?...........she was and is everything I always knew she would be.......all of those nights of praying......night after night after night after night......I guess God decided he better give me what I wanted cause I sure wasn't gonna leave him alone until he did!

I Left My Baby In A Strange Place

Yesterday I left my baby boy in Tuscaloosa, AL. The University of Alabama to be exact. He will be gone a whole week. What kind of Mother am I? I can't believe I left him there. I know, I know he is seventeen years old and to YOU he is not a baby but, to me he is still my baby.

When you look at him you see this.....


When I look at him I see this...........


So don't try to tell me he is not my baby.........he will always be my my eyes.