This is a random collection of bits and pieces of my life as a Girl Raised In The South (Grits). It is about family and friends and our lives as we live it in the South.
Saturday, June 7, 2014
Bailey's Story
Our Bailey came into this world in October of 2007, she was one of five born to our Poodles Brandy and Whiskey. All of the puppies grew and thrived and one by one, their little eyes started to open....all except one of the smallest of the bunch. I took her to the vet and was told that her little eyes did not develop and she would be blind.
I left the vets office that day cradling this little tiny baby with tears pouring down my face. I worried about what was going to happened to her.....would she have a life and if so, what kind of life would it be.
I was told by some to have her put to sleep.....they said it wasn't fair to prolong her life knowing she would never see. All I could think to myself was......she is healthy....she is just blind. Why on earth would I end her life over something like this.
The decision was made that this sweet baby would become a permanent part of our lives. We named her Bailey. She grew and thrived and learned how to make her way in her own little world. When Bailey was a wee little thing, she would hold on to her Mama's tail so that she would know which way to go. One day.......she knew all on her own, which way to go!
Bailey grew to be a loving and trusting little one. She has never met a stranger and she will approach everyone, both human and animal, trusting that they will never bring harm to her. The funny thing was, every single dog or animal she has ever met, treated her with tender care. It is as if they know she is special.
Bailey will run and play just as hard as all the other dogs, even though she can not see. We taught her to listen to our voice so that she did not run into things. She has a sweet way of tilting her head when you talk to her. It is her way of letting you know she is listening.
Bailey learned to sit and stand on her hind legs and dance. She never learned how to chase and retrieve a ball but, she did figure out that she could chase and tackle the other poodles to the ground when THEY were chasing the ball.
Bailey always slept with Ethan until he left home. She slept under the covers, never on top. Sometimes you might see the tip of her nose sticking out a little but, that was it.
We often forget that she is actually blind. She will run full force in the yard and can chase down every dog we have. She will daintily tip toe past the trees in the yard until she gets to the open area and then she is off like a shot. She will run down the hall full force, make the corner and leap onto our bed.
Bailey is scared to pieces of the rain and thunder. The only place she is comfortable being is at home. Any where else and she shakes like a leaf.
Bailey doesn't know she is different, being blind is all she has ever known. As far as she knows everyone else is just like her. With the exception of a few things to keep her safe and to ease her way, we have never treated her any differently that all of our sighted dogs. She is such a sweet little dog, loving her is easy.
There has never been a time that we have regretted making Bailey a permanent part of our lives. She has brought nothing but, joy to our lives. She is sweet natured and happy. She is loving and smart. She has taught me that anyone or any being can overcome some of life's hardest things.
Today, our Bailey is at the vets office fighting for her life. It seems so unfair that a little dog that started out with such a rough start, should have to go through something like this now. I pray that our Bailey can fight her way through. I just can't imagine our lives without her sweet presence.
I held her in my arms all night on Wednesday night before taking her to the vet. We are now on day three of her being away from us. I pray that she will soon be in my arms again.
Tuesday, April 30, 2013
The Love Of My Life
I did not realize that it has been exactly a year since I wrote in my blog. I am such a slacker! Any way. Once again, I am about to celebrate an anniversary with the Love of my Life. Thrity-one years! Wow, time has really flown by for us.
The young man that I married, thirty one years ago has become my best friend, the love of my life, my heart, my soul.....the very air that I breathe. I knew from the time I was seventeen years old, that I wanted to marry Tim Parrish, have children with him and grow old with him.......that is exactly the way my life has played out.
We started out with young exciting love and now that love has grown into mature, strong, secure and yes even more exciting love. When you are young and in love, you can not even imagine the true forever love that it turns into.
We have had our ups and downs but, we have worked through those times together and have become stronger not only individually but, also as a couple. I know this mans thoughts before he ever puts them into words. I know his likes and dislikes, I know how to make him laugh and I know what to say to make him feel better. And, you know what? He knows me in the same way.
Even after 31 years of marriage and almost 33 years together, my heart still skips a beat when he walks in the door. Hearing his voice still sends a thrill through my heart. Most of all, seeing the pride he has in our children and watching his heart melting smile when he looks at our grand son Clayton, just makes me fall even more in love with him.
To the love of my life.......my soul mate......my best friend. I love you more today than I did yesterday and I love you less today than I will tomorrow.
Tuesday, May 1, 2012
Marriage Is Like A Pot of Soup
Today is the day that Me and Tim celebrate thirty years of marriage. Hard to believe we have been married that long! One thing I have learned about marriage is.....it is a lot like a good pot of home made soup!
You start out throwing in your main ingredients. Well, we all know that just throwing a couple of things in a pot doesn't make soup. You taste it and if it is not just right, you make adjustments. You may throw in a few spices to liven things up. You set it to simmer. Don't let it simmer too long though.......you have to stir it up every now and then. Don't set the heat to high or it will boil over or worse it will scorch. You don't want to have to throw it out and start over! You sometimes try to stick to a recipe but, we all know that sometimes you have to make it your own and not someones elses! With a lot of attention, patience, imagination and adjustment anyone can have a perfect pot of soup!
I will not sit here and pretend that our marriage is perfect. There is no such thing. We work at it every day. There have been times that we have almost wanted to give up but, we didn't. We knew that what we had was worth fighting for. We have learned to add the spices when needed. We have learned when to stir it, when to raise the heat and when to let it simmer for a while. Most of all, we have learned to add the right ingredients to make a marriage. A marriage that has made it through thirty years of happiness, heartache, joy, sorrow, laughter and at times confusion. In the end what we have is a house full of beautiful children, a perfect grandbaby and each other. Always each other! What more can we ask.......we have an almost perfect pot of soup!
You start out throwing in your main ingredients. Well, we all know that just throwing a couple of things in a pot doesn't make soup. You taste it and if it is not just right, you make adjustments. You may throw in a few spices to liven things up. You set it to simmer. Don't let it simmer too long though.......you have to stir it up every now and then. Don't set the heat to high or it will boil over or worse it will scorch. You don't want to have to throw it out and start over! You sometimes try to stick to a recipe but, we all know that sometimes you have to make it your own and not someones elses! With a lot of attention, patience, imagination and adjustment anyone can have a perfect pot of soup!
I will not sit here and pretend that our marriage is perfect. There is no such thing. We work at it every day. There have been times that we have almost wanted to give up but, we didn't. We knew that what we had was worth fighting for. We have learned to add the spices when needed. We have learned when to stir it, when to raise the heat and when to let it simmer for a while. Most of all, we have learned to add the right ingredients to make a marriage. A marriage that has made it through thirty years of happiness, heartache, joy, sorrow, laughter and at times confusion. In the end what we have is a house full of beautiful children, a perfect grandbaby and each other. Always each other! What more can we ask.......we have an almost perfect pot of soup!
Monday, March 5, 2012
Lost And Found
A little over four years ago, I lost a part of myself. I also found something that night and it is not something I wanted. On that night, I lost my joy and I found fear.
For those of you who know me, you know about that life changing night and there is no need for details. Just suffice it to say, it was the worst night of my life.
Laughter and joy have always been such a huge part of me and that night it went away. That part of me was lost and I did not know if I would ever get it back again.
That night I also found fear. A deep abiding fear. A fear that has become my constant companion. Without my joy, I wondered, would I be able to overcome the fear? At times the fear was so overwhelming, I could not breathe. I could feel it clawing at my throat and even devouring my soul.
Over the weeks and months, I found myself able to smile and even laugh but, I never felt like it reached my heart or my eyes. I often wondered if people could see that I was no longer me.
Over the years, I have gradually gained back pieces of me and most of the time I can keep the fear at bay. Sometimes, it still overtakes me and I feel like I am about to suffocate. When I get like that, I find myself withdrawing into myself and not allowing anyone in. I don't want anyone to see that fear......that evil, horrible fear.
My greatest joy was when I was with my kids and Tim. Even then, I could still feel a piece of me that just couldn't let go and open enough to feel that complete and utter joy! On November 22, 2011, I was able to watch as my first grandchild came into this world. As I saw that wonderful miracle appear, take his first breath and heard his first cry, I felt something loosen in my heart and spill out. That small piece of my heart, was suddenly filled with that complete utter joy that I had been looking for. That little bitty boy gave me back my joy, that thing that had been taken from me was given back!
Since his birth, I have felt peace and joy again. My laughter is back and it is the kind of laughter that comes from deep within. My heart is light again. I am able to enjoy everything in my life without guilt. I know now that I deserve to be happy.
While the fear is still there, it is not the biggest part of my life. The joy and laughter I have with my husband and kids helps to keep the fear at bay. While that night will ALWAYS be a part of me.....it is no longer WHO I am. I am the person who likes to joke around.....I am the person who can be serious when I need to be but, I am the person who would much rather be laughing. Mostly, I am the person I have been trying to be........and that is..........ME! What was one time lost, has been found! I have finally found ME!
For those of you who know me, you know about that life changing night and there is no need for details. Just suffice it to say, it was the worst night of my life.
Laughter and joy have always been such a huge part of me and that night it went away. That part of me was lost and I did not know if I would ever get it back again.
That night I also found fear. A deep abiding fear. A fear that has become my constant companion. Without my joy, I wondered, would I be able to overcome the fear? At times the fear was so overwhelming, I could not breathe. I could feel it clawing at my throat and even devouring my soul.
Over the weeks and months, I found myself able to smile and even laugh but, I never felt like it reached my heart or my eyes. I often wondered if people could see that I was no longer me.
Over the years, I have gradually gained back pieces of me and most of the time I can keep the fear at bay. Sometimes, it still overtakes me and I feel like I am about to suffocate. When I get like that, I find myself withdrawing into myself and not allowing anyone in. I don't want anyone to see that fear......that evil, horrible fear.
My greatest joy was when I was with my kids and Tim. Even then, I could still feel a piece of me that just couldn't let go and open enough to feel that complete and utter joy! On November 22, 2011, I was able to watch as my first grandchild came into this world. As I saw that wonderful miracle appear, take his first breath and heard his first cry, I felt something loosen in my heart and spill out. That small piece of my heart, was suddenly filled with that complete utter joy that I had been looking for. That little bitty boy gave me back my joy, that thing that had been taken from me was given back!
Since his birth, I have felt peace and joy again. My laughter is back and it is the kind of laughter that comes from deep within. My heart is light again. I am able to enjoy everything in my life without guilt. I know now that I deserve to be happy.
While the fear is still there, it is not the biggest part of my life. The joy and laughter I have with my husband and kids helps to keep the fear at bay. While that night will ALWAYS be a part of me.....it is no longer WHO I am. I am the person who likes to joke around.....I am the person who can be serious when I need to be but, I am the person who would much rather be laughing. Mostly, I am the person I have been trying to be........and that is..........ME! What was one time lost, has been found! I have finally found ME!
Thursday, February 16, 2012
The Baby Turns Eighteen
On February 17th, 18 years ago, our baby girl was born. This is the child that we did not plan but, God thought we deserved her. That is why I have always called her our bonus baby. We had two perfect boys but, we got an extra treat.....We got Hayden!
It is hard to believe that 18 years ago, we were so worried about our little girl. She was so very sick and we did not know if she was going to make it. I kept telling myself she was going to be fine and I just wish that it was 10 years or 15 years from now and this would all be a distant memory. Here we are 18 years later and yes, it is a distant memory.
Even back then, I made my way through life by keeping a journal. Back then, I had never even heard of an online blog.......I just wrote it all down on paper. This is a small passage from that time.
"I have done good in front of everyone, now I am in the car with Tim, praying my baby makes it to Montgomery alive. I feel so helpless. I have to cry. I am so scared. I know that God gave her to us for a reason and he won't take her away. I have complete trust but, I am still so scared."
Even after all these years, I can't read this journal without crying. When I read this, it takes me back 18 years ago. I am however so thankful, that all these years later. Our baby is a healthy beautiful young woman.
Hayden is artistic, funny, quirky and frankly just does her own thing. What other people think does not matter to her. She is true to herself and the values she has been taught.
She is loved by her brothers, has her Daddy wrapped around her finger and she is my joy! Hayden is loved and adored and she is secure in that love.
Happy 18th Birthday my beautiful, precious daughter! I love you!
It is hard to believe that 18 years ago, we were so worried about our little girl. She was so very sick and we did not know if she was going to make it. I kept telling myself she was going to be fine and I just wish that it was 10 years or 15 years from now and this would all be a distant memory. Here we are 18 years later and yes, it is a distant memory.
Even back then, I made my way through life by keeping a journal. Back then, I had never even heard of an online blog.......I just wrote it all down on paper. This is a small passage from that time.
"I have done good in front of everyone, now I am in the car with Tim, praying my baby makes it to Montgomery alive. I feel so helpless. I have to cry. I am so scared. I know that God gave her to us for a reason and he won't take her away. I have complete trust but, I am still so scared."
Even after all these years, I can't read this journal without crying. When I read this, it takes me back 18 years ago. I am however so thankful, that all these years later. Our baby is a healthy beautiful young woman.
Hayden is artistic, funny, quirky and frankly just does her own thing. What other people think does not matter to her. She is true to herself and the values she has been taught.
She is loved by her brothers, has her Daddy wrapped around her finger and she is my joy! Hayden is loved and adored and she is secure in that love.
Happy 18th Birthday my beautiful, precious daughter! I love you!
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